Chip Count

As I was gallivanting around my new neighborhood I noticed a corner market, its doors and windows caged like there should be animals inside of it. The individuals spilling out were a combination of Gary Busey and your typical hipster kid. Curious, like a cat I went inside.

I always liked corner markets. Some call them ghetto, I call them miniature diamonds in the rough. If I didn't go inside I wouldn't have found the epic plethora of chips they had on display. I'm not a chip gal, per say but I do enjoy a crispy treat from time to time. I stood there and picked one out....then another..and another....

Needless to say I picked 4 bags. SO, I guess for the time being I am a chip gal.

Now I shall rate them on taste, bag creativity, bag smell, crispiness, chip size and addictiveness.

Kettle Brand Spicy Thai



Bag Creativity: It looks like a 3rd grader with MS Paint did it. Yes if you enjoy simplicity by all means, love this bag. But I do love the color red.
Bag Smell: Thai-y. You can spot on smell the ginger right off the bat.
Crispiness: Its kettle cooked so you'd expect a nice crunch. And that, you do.
Chip Size: Nothing too snazzy, regular sized chips, the kind you'd expect thats kettle cooked.
Taste: Each bite you taste another flavor, just like in thai food it has many spices. Which leads me to...
Addictiveness: You'll want to eat the whole bag, but the grease factor sets in and being the smart person you are you'll settle for about 5 handfuls.

Sylvia's Honey Jalapeño


Bag Creativity: It makes me feel weird. Since there are Packers and Vikings colors on the bag. Sylvia, you must be a Saints fan. But I guess Sylvia is the "Queen Of Soul Food" welp, last time I checked chips aren't full of soul.
Bag Smell: Smells like chips. I'm kind of bored with it.
Crispiness: Not that crispy, kind of feels like you're biting into a soft pillow that melts in your mouth. My soul feels lifted. (Good job, Syl.)
Chip Size: Most of them are about the size of a 8 month year olds fist. (sorry only thing I could really compare it to)
Taste: Nothing too snazzy here, has a bit of a bite to it but the honey evens the spice out nicely.
Addictiveness: I wouldn't sit down and eat a whole bag of these. BUT, Sylvia you did a good job.


Vinter's "The Original" "Louisiana" The Perfect HOT SAUCE 'One Drop Does It' Potato Chips!!




Bag Creativity: First off, awesome product placement. I saw this bag and I automatically got excited. But then I read its "naturally delicious"....wait. How so? Now I'm confused. Also, it seems like "V" from V For Vendetta also sponsors these chips. THEN you got this guy:

There is so much business on this bag I don't think I want to eat these chips anymore. I mean, this guy here Vinnie is sweating. I don't want to sweat while I eat. My dad does that and its disgusting.
Bag Smell: It smells like Louisiana Hot Sauce. My nose now has a vendetta against me. Ooooooh, I see why the "V" is there now.
Crispiness: It has a good ol fashioned crunch. Not the chip that'll rip the roof of your mouth like Cap'n Crunch.
Chip Size: I think I sat on this bag....moving on.
Taste: SPICY. Just like its sauce form it makes your mouth feel tingly.
Addictiveness: If I could put chicken on these, I would.

Lays Limón


Bag Creativity: I love the green. The awkwardness that is chips near limes sucked me into buying this bag. I mean really? Lime? Seriously? Is this real life?
Bag Smell: Smells like a regular ol' bag of Lays.
Crispiness: Has that light crispy airness that we all know and love.
Chip Size: You know how it goes with lays, crumbles on the bottom that are mini jihad's to your gumline, regular sized chips and about 4 Andre The Giant chips.
Taste: Oh my god. Oh. My. God. This is bliss, where have these been my whole life!? I want to bathe in them. No, I really don't but....you get the idea.
Addictiveness: This bag is now gone, and I'm automatically sad about this. So more of these need to be bought. MAS LIMON PAPITAS FRITAS, POR FAVOR! You must find these, and consume them. Thank me later.